Matthew is FOUR!

Where has the time gone? My big guy is bigger! His birth was a fast and furious one, being only 4.5 hrs but much more painful than I remember natural childbirth being. Of course he was oh so worth it. I remember the moment I first held him, all 8lbs 12oz, I was SOO relieved to have him in my arms, thanking God, for some reason I was worried that something would be wrong with him, and thankfully I was wrong! He melted my heart instantly with his little bit of red hair and chubby cheeked face. Today he wins my heart just the same except now I have even more reasons to love him. He's so smart, he gives hugs, his eyes sparkle with excitement, he's my Mr Matthew and so grateful for that. This year for him has been a tremendous one! He has many challenges to deal with still but he's been checking them off one by one as challenge successfully met. Of course I can't take all of the credit, Ms Rich and her crew at Colchester Elementary school has done an amazing job with him. their love for him is very true, I yet again get lucky by moving here and having their expertise. We had a little party for him here and he will have his friend party next week, which I am really looking forward to. Of course it's alittle late but one thing about Matthew is he's pretty forgiving and loves me just the same. Happy Birthday, you've been more than Mommy could have ever dreamt up!

Holding a Gem!

Everyone loves to hold Ben, and that now includes Matthew!! Of course he's not at the point of asking to hold him, but he will let Mommy take a pic if I really ask nicely LOL Maria continues to love a cuddle with baby brother. We have issues we're still working out about adding Ben to our family but we are all doing it because we love each other and I know we'll come out in the end whole and happy. Look at the love in these faces :) Benjamin continues to have more awake time. We had a birthday party for Matthew yesterday and Grandma Marjie and Grandpa Tom came and boy did Benjamin cry before they left, he finally conked from fatigue. We still love cuddling the little guy even when he cries though we feel badly when Bugaboo cries :(

Growing boy!

Yesterday Benjamin went to the Dr and he weighed a whopping 10lbs 5oz and 22.25 inches long! It's always hard to chose what pics to post :) Today I have Benjamin just chilling on the couch with me probably doing laundry or waiting for a bus. There is also a pic of him enjoying the papasan seat that my friend Stacy let me borrow (Thanks Stacy). Of course if you wrap him up in his swaddle me blanket he will be quite content, great gift for that new mom if you have one to shop for!! Finally there is a pic of Todd enjoying incorporating Ben into his life, for a great jog! Of course Benjamin is a tad small for it but he just did an easy jog so no harm to our precious boy! Not much else to say as I am pretty tired :(
Non kid news is I went to court again Monday and of course no resolution. As you can imagine it's getting pretty tough on me to have this unresolved. Yeah I get my current settlement still followed, but I feel like I can't plan for my future. I am getting wierd dreams which are making it even tougher to get sleep. A hearing has been set for May 9th at 11AM, I am told that this is the last time it will be postponed. I have a month to dread testifying and to practice positive thinking LOL If you could keep me in your thoughts and pray that whatever happens is the best for the kids that would comfort me :) One thing that came from this court appearance was my lawyer telling me that I will be asked to describe life with an autistic child. She wanted me to tell the judge what is different from parenting him verses a typical child as to show the real need for me to stay with Matthew. I actually stopped in my mind and tried to think what IS my life like to parent Matthew. Well, hard of course but parenting any child gets tough at times. Matthew is just Matthew and I couldn't actually think of things off the top of my head. I had to really think ok, typical verses atypical. I'm glad I got the time to think of what I would say. And with having Benjamin seems like some autistic traits have surfaced but yet I stil think of Matthew as Matthew my mysterious boy not my autistic son, kinda a relief at teh same time even though if I was asked that on the stand I would have been unclear to the judge.
Enjoy the pics! Next time I have some real sweet pics of Maria and Benjamin to share :) Matthew has yet to hold Benjamin :( But he is closing in and I think he will so it soon...this scrapbooking momma hopes so anyway.

We have a belly button!!

Poor Benjamin has had a slight cold these past few days :( The good news is that his belly button is now here, no more cord! He can now have a real bath! I thought since he can now sit in the water that he would like bath, but I was wrong, poor bugaboo does not like bath...yet. Hopefully when he can play with toys he'll be happier, Of course he was much happier once he was out and resting on Daddy's chest. He's usually good for Daddy, what's with that? Gives Mommy troubles during the dya, sleeps on Daddy at night. Maria and Matthew were a great audience, they're doing well :)